“HR isn’t your friend”
Let’s be upfront. This is an emotive phrase. On one side you often have Human Resources Professionals (HRPs) who don’t have the decision-making power working in the background for what they hope will be a positive outcome for all, but often failing because of a operational management decisions and influences. On the other side, you have an employee, often disempowered, feeling unheard, uncared for and blamed for being targeted by harmful behaviours. HR, in this context, is not only not your friend; they are an overt enemy.
But what if we dive deeper on this comment? Is there a system that underlies this that hasn’t worked, failing both employees, HRPs and organisations overall?
I argue yes, and until this is acknowledged, HR will not be able to effectively manage organisational risk and the continuing harm to individuals and the workplace itself.
The Perception of HR
The rise of social media has given voice to many opinions. Some are true, some not, and others somewhere in between.
In my consulting world, the world of psychosocial risk arising from harmful workplace behaviours (particularly bullying and harassment) HR are broadly not perceived as a safe place for employees to seek help. Yet many organisations make their HR department their port of call if employees need to raise a concern and they don’t feel they can do so with their line manager or supervisor. This approach is often documented in policies and procedures. HR is implied to be a safe place where employees can get help.
But perceptions indicate otherwise. A recent research paper presented the existing perceptions of HRPs when it comes to bullying at work. In this paper, four (4) key themes were identified:
- Dealing with workplace bullying is assumed to be HR’s responsibility by staff. While this is not a mandated role of HR, many employers direct their staff to HR if they have a concern about bullying behaviour.
- HR are perceived as complacent in dealing with workplace bullying. They are perceived to be ineffective, avoiding or oblivious to bullying at work. As a consequence the perception is that HR can’t or won’t help bullied targets.
- Employees perceive HR to be complicit in workplace bullying. The implication is that HR actively sides with the management hierarchy at the expense, and expulsion from the workplace, of the bullied target. This, in effect, is perceived to harm the organisation itself. The impact of this is employees don’t see the point in approaching HR in situations of bullying.
- HR compound workplace bullying. This is that they, as opposed to mitigating the risk, in fact make it worse. (Boddy et al, 2024)
The workplace system that underlies this is the human behaviour management system. This comprises of those documents and process that are proactive (eg. codes of conduct, preventative training and education like bullying awareness, health and safety policies) and reactive behaviour management (eg. bullying and harassment policies and procedures, complaints management policies and procedures).
But this is not really new…
The failing of this part of the human management system is not new. As mentioned above, employees having greater access to public channels to voice frustrations is what’s changed.
We know this is not a new issue by looking at previous research. In 2014, only 9% of employees reported being likely to lodge a formal workplace complaint, while 13.5% spoke to HR about bullying concerns. Ignoring or avoiding a bullying situation was more likely to be the approach for approximately half of the respondents. (Magee et al, 2014) Surgeons reported making a complaint as “career suicide” in 2015. (RACS, 2015)
In 2016, a Victorian Government’s report advised that 30% of employees surveyed responded that they held “Distrust of human resources departments as a tool of management or as ineffective”. (Victorian Auditor General, 2016)
Indications are that the workplace response to bullying, and the systems that under pin this, have been significantly ineffective for some time.
Perception Equals Reduced Capacity to Manage Risk
There is a potential that this perception may lead to HRPs taking this personally. While it is important to acknowledge those related feelings, it’s vital to step back and look at the why. Swimming upstream, it’s indicative of a workplace systems problem. If this isn’t addressed, then workplaces aren’t going to be able to effectively mitigate the costly risk of harm at work.
Workers Compensation data provides us with important insights as to the cost to workplaces that have a claim related to psychological injury including from bullying and harassment. Average cost of claims and lost work time is presented. (Safework Australia, 2025)
Early Intervention Using a Systems Approach
As HR has developed over the years, it has become increasingly complex with multiple roles and functions both operational and strategic.
HR, the organisational “go to”, needs to lead from the front to change perceptions. This is essential if it is to effectively mitigate risk. This includes implementing systems that allow early intervention and prevent escalation to bullying and harassment claims.
A key workplace approach that research tells us helps prevent the incidence of bullying is a positive conflict management climate. In a workplace with this characteristic, there are policies and procedures that support early intervention in conflict. Training provided is focused on employees at all levels to confidently manage early conflict, and not ignore it as can often be the case, which leads to escalation. Leaders, including managers, supervisors, HR and H&S are mentors and coaches to their team members in early stages of conflict, as opposed to parents who manage conflict for them. (Bloomberg et al, 2025)
Equally important is that research has pointed to the decreased geographical, social, institutional, cognitive and organisational proximity of HR being increasingly problematic. A lack of proximity to managers and employees in general negatively impacts on key social proximity factors including relationship building and trust. HR can’t be a conflict mentor or coaches for managers and supervisors if there is inaccessibility or barriers of geography. It’s these factors, a lack of relationship and trust, and HR often appearing at the end when conflict has escalated out of control, that lead to the belief that ‘HR is not your friend’. (Saundry et al, 2020)
HR must consider their own systems, structures and processes (along with the organisational systems), if they are to effectively prevent the psychosocial risk that comes out of bullying and harassment. HR needs to consider that to change the perception which creates the risk management barrier, then they need to be proactive to ‘be the friend’.
